


The Agenda

by ennuithereyet, haganenoheichou



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: AU, M/M, NSFW, Slow Burn, eruri - Freeform, politician!AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-15
Updated: 2016-01-16
Packaged: 2018-05-14 04:58:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,941
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5730331
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ennuithereyet/pseuds/ennuithereyet, https://archiveofourown.org/users/haganenoheichou/pseuds/haganenoheichou
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Levi Ackerman answers a job ad on Craigslist, he definitely doesn't expect to meet the most honest politician on earth. Neither does he expect to fall for him – and the shit that comes crashing down on both of them when he does.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Application

**Author's Note:**

> So this is the politician AU that @ennuithereyet and I have been obsessing over for the past several months, converted into fic format for those who were interested. Yup, it's happening.

Levi sighed in frustration as he looked from his phone to the door in front of him. This was it. The so-called _Survey Corps_.

_Fucking politicians and their fancy party names,_ he thought as he looked at the plaque next to the mahogany monstrosity that potentially held his future. He knew that he was supposed to be counting his blessings, given the fact that he had nowhere else to turn to for work. It had been by luck only that he'd managed to land this job – and it had been weird, too. He'd called in on the ad ( _Craigslist_ , of all things), and the man in charge had been too fucking busy fucking his secretary or whatever to even schedule and interview. _You're hired, can you come in tomorrow?_

Levi huffed. The man was probably a complete dolt. Well, he could just back out if things got too weird. With that in mind, he raised a fist to knock on the door.

The door opened to reveal a petite strawberry blonde, who was apparently going to irritate Levi with her niceness – he could tell already, given the fact that she didn’t even know him, he could be suicide bomber for all she knew, and yet she was already smiling her little face off.

She glimpsed his visitor’s nametag and her smile go even wider.

"You must be the new assistant," the woman said, ushering Levi inside and reaching out to shake his hand at the same time. "I'm Petra, head of communications. Thank goodness you're here. His last assistant had to leave for health reasons, and he's been absolutely swamped since then."

Levi followed Petra into the office, looking around curiously. It was clear that nobody here had any sort of standards when it came to cleanliness. He was going to have to talk to this Senator Smith about proper hygiene in the working environment. After all, that was one of the useless Bachelor's degrees he'd graduated with, alongside political communication. Both diplomas had ended up completely useless, and he'd been stuck without a job and a zillion student loans to face for a couple of years now. He'd taken a job as a barista, even, which had been the most loathsome experience of his life.

Petra led Levi over to a desk right next to the door to what Levi assumed to be the boss’s office, given the heavier and more imposing door. "This will be your desk. I'll just let Senator Smith know you're here and then work on getting you all the paperwork you need to read through and sign. He'll want to talk to you, but I need to check if he has a free minute first."

As Petra went to check up on the Senator, Levi sat primly at the desk, feeling uneasy. He wondered what this Senator was like. Probably a pot-bellied liar like the rest of them. The job had come his way so quickly that Levi had even neglected to do research. Small time Senators were not big in the media, so he didn't even know what the man looked like.

"He'll be right with you," Petra said cheerfully as she walked out, a little flustered. "Just wait for him to invite you in. All right?"

Levi nodded, hating her cheeriness more and more. Just then, a pretty good looking blond head peeked out from behind the office door.

"Levi?" Presumably Senator Smith asked, looking towards the assistant's desk.

"Come in," he said once he spotted the new employee. "Sorry about the wait, things are always busy around here, especially since my last assistant had to leave."

There were two things that Levi noticed once he was in Senator Smith's office. Number one, the place was absolutely disgusting. Papers everywhere, dust bunnies, filth. His eye twitched. Great, he didn't need this kind of stress on his first day of work. He bit his tongue, though, knowing politicians were tricky folk who didn't like to be criticized. And number two was part of why he shut up about the dirt. Senator Smith was fucking hot. Ridiculously so. And young. Levi squinted. Not a hint of a pot belly.

"Er... Levi Ackerman, sir," the dark-haired man said quietly, looking into very, very blue eyes.

Erwin smiled and held out his hand for Levi to shake.

"You don't have to call me 'sir,'" he assured the dark-haired as he went to sit down at his desk, motioning to one of the guest chairs across from it. "Or even 'Senator Smith.' You can just call me Erwin. It'll be easier that way. I'm sorry I didn't have time to bring you in for an interview..."

Smith looked to his phone, and Levi felt the itch of irritation beneath his skin. _Fucking busybody._

"I did look at your resume and cover letter, though. I have it around here somewhere..." Erwin rifled through a stack of papers on his desk until he came up with what he was looking for. Levi watched on as Erwin knocked around the papers on his desk with his lip curled up in barely disguised horrification. He couldn't believe this man wanted to be put in charge of their country's decisions when he could barely keep his office straight. Well, he couldn't actually.  "You went to school for political communication and... what was your other major here?"

"With all due respect to your... office atmosphere," Levi began, desperate to put some distance between the tall blond and him. "I do believe that a certain degree of professionalism has to be upheld. Which is why I will call you Mister Smith and Senator. That is what you are. Power relationships and all. That was my second major. Workplace Ethics and Hygiene. Not the most effective degree to have, when it comes to employment."

He paused, unable to contain himself. "Although something tells me your office needs someone with that particular specialty."

Erwin laughed, seemingly not at all offended by Levi's comment about the state of his office.

"I know, I definitely need some help with organization here. I just don't have the time to do it on my own. I need a better organizational system than just these piles and the baskets over by the wall. Maybe that's something you could help me with. Now..."

He looked at Levi's resume again. "Do you have any experience working in an office or as an assistant?"

"No," Levi said, looking at Erwin directly.

"I do realize that as a public person, you need someone who has more experience that me, but the job market's been slow. So I have experience being yelled at and mopping floors, mostly. I can make a good cup of coffee, too, which is part of my new job, isn't it?" He asked, getting bolder as he saw that Erwin was quite familiar with his employees.

"I usually have one of the interns make my coffee, but since you have experience I think it'd be a shame if I didn't at least try a cup that you made," Erwin said with a smile. "And I'm sure between your two majors you have enough qualification for the job. Most of the news-scouring and fact-checking and all that is done by the interns, who you'll meet later. Mostly what I need you to do is be in charge of my schedule, which I'll admit isn't an easy job. You'll also be managing phone calls, helping organize, helping me find things because things get lost here all the time, taking minutes for me at meetings, that sort of stuff. I doubt you'll be mopping floors or getting yelled at. We have a janitorial team to do the former, and as for the latter, well. I'm usually the one getting yelled at around here, but that's the life of a congressman."

_Poor, ridiculously rich you,_ Levi thought irritably, but again, said nothing. He simply nodded, listening to the list of the jobs Erwin had assigned to him. All of those things were pretty basic, and he'd been trained to do them in theory in college. Well, he'd been trained to do much more, but managing phone calls and organizing political agendas, making sure the boss wasn't late for his meetings and such, all of that was part of Levi's new duties.

"All right, sounds easy enough," Levi said quietly. "If you don't mind, I would like to know if there is a Mrs. Senator Smith whom I would have to patch through to yell at you at regular intervals?"

Erwin laughed light-heartedly at the question.

"No, no need to worry about a significant other," he assured Levi. "I'll admit I don't have much of a personal life at all, so that should make it easier on you."

"All right," Levi said, not liking the way he felt relief flood his system. There was no fucking way he was going to mess this job up by fucking the boss. He knew that he could seduce Erwin, it was easy, considering how easy it was to read the man; but he didn't want to lose this opportunity. This was a stepping stone for him, and he had to hold on to it as much as he could.

"Then, if you'll excuse me, I will go organize that disaster of a filing system."

"Oh, before you do," Erwin stopped him. "You'll need to see Oluo, my financial director, about getting your salary and benefits all set up, and I'll have Petra get you the info about getting an official badge and your login and email for the computers. Send me an email…" Erwin found one of his business cards and handed it over to Levi. "…Once you have your address so I can put it in my contacts and share my calendar with you so you can edit it. Let's see, what else... We have a weekly staff meeting today at two. Oh, and normally I work through lunch, but you're welcome to take an hour. There's a cafeteria somewhere in the building, but I've never been there. Just let me know before you take off, ok?"

"It's all right," Levi said, getting up. "I don't eat when I work. Too much of a distraction. If you do want me to order you something, then let me know, I guess. I'll make sure it comes with an apron or something."

With that, he was out of the office and down the corridor, his heart pounding. He couldn't believe he'd just said that to his boss whom he'd met for the first time just moments before. What the hell was wrong with him?

Levi ended up staying late on his first day. Erwin's filing cabinet was a mess and nobody seemed to care about that, so he was the one who'd stated he would take care of it. Petra had been the last to leave him in the office with the dim light of the table lamp. He glanced sideways at the sliver of light emanating from Erwin's office. Well, at least he wasn't making himself to be a complete workaholic. _If_ the boss was still there, he was good.

"Willson... Willson... Shit, where the fuck are the W's?" He muttered.

"You can go home, if you want."

Levi looked up to see the Senator standing in his doorway, shirt slightly untucked and tie askew, but still pretty fucking good-looking. _Shut up, mind. You just need to go out and get laid or something. Not by your boss._

"You don't have to stay until after I leave. I tend to work late every day."

Levi glanced at Erwin, trying to appear nonchalant even though it was pretty fucking hard with those blue eyes staring his down.

"Don't worry, sir, I'm not doing this for your benefit. Well, I am, but not to make you feel better about having nobody to go home to. And not because I'm homeless or something. I won't sleep here, I promise," Levi said dryly. "I figured I'd finish the job. Not that I have anything to look forward to for the rest of the night, unlike some, no doubt."

Erwin furrowed his brow in confusion.

"I wasn't expecting you to stay here for that reason," he told Levi. "Some of my staff members in the past thought that it would leave a bad impression if they left for the day before I did, and I wanted to make sure you weren't going to. And I don't have anything else to look forward tonight. You have my schedule now, you should know that."

He paused, and Levi found the silence horribly awkward, especially given how he was kneeling at the man’s feet.

"You aren't actually homeless, right?"

Levi narrowed his eyes, his facial expression turning into a grimace.

"Just because I don't wear a tailored suit doesn't mean I'm a bum. Yes, I have student loans and a ton of bank credit to cover. But I do well enough for myself. I don't need your condescension." He looked down at the papers, realizing he had just screwed up hugely.

"Sorry, sir. It's been a stressful day. I tend to say things that are really on my mind when I'm tried."

Erwin gave Levi a curious look. "There are homeless people who are careful about keeping their suits pressed because they need to to get a job. And since you were so adamant about telling me you weren't homeless even before I asked... Well, can you blame me for worrying? I care about my staff, you know. I don't want any of them out on the streets."

"Well, I'm not homeless, all right?" Levi bit out. He knew that he was going off on the man a bit unfairly, it wasn't Erwin's fault that his entire childhood had been spent wondering from orphanage to orphanage with barely a penny to his name. It wasn't Erwin's fault that he had never really known his father and that his mother had turned out to be a crackhead stripper when he'd gone looking for her. It wasn't Erwin's fault and yet he was such an easy target with his fucking blue eyes and compassionate features of a liberal politician.

"Drop it. Please. I don't want to say something that will land me on the street because it will make both of us uncomfortable, apparently."

Erwin gave Levi a long look before heading towards the kitchenette for more coffee. As the day had progressed, Levi had concluded that the man would probably die young of a heart attack considering how much caffeine he consumed. When he returned, Levi was still filing, and the lovely smell of a fresh cup of brew was wafting through the air.

"So," Erwin said. "I see you've decided to tackle the filing cabinets first."

_Fuck, I'm going to have to do small talk with the guy,_ Levi thought exasperatedly. He tried to focus as much as he could on the papers as he replied.

"I figured it would be easier to start small. Papers, books, folders. And then maybe I'll get to the dust and grime under your desk. If there's someone you should sack, it's the cleaning personnel. They're pathetic at their job."

Erwin shrugged.

"I usually tell them they can skip my office," he admitted. "I'm normally still working when they come by, and it'd make things harder for both of us if they tried to clean while I was still here."

"You seem to work a lot. For a politician, I mean," Levi said, looking up from the folder he'd been organizing and putting it aside onto the side of his desk. He shifted, reaching for the next one. "Not much of a personal life, huh? That's strange, I thought girls were all about politicians now. You know, Kanye's out, Trump's in, or something."

"First of all," Erwin said. "You cannot call Trump a politician. He has no political experience. Even in regards to his business experience, he's been bankrupt four times. The only reason he's rich is because he inherited a lot from his parents, and if he'd handled it properly he should be much, much richer than he is right now. Second of all, I just have no need for much of a personal life at the moment."

Erwin shrugged, a little self-consciously. "I don't want to use my position to help me find someone to date - even if that weren't morally wrong, I wouldn't want to be with someone who just wants me for my power, or because they think I have money, or something."

Levi snorted at Erwin's rant. "At least we agree on one thing. That Trump's a piece of shit scumbag, that is."

He didn't hold back when he was expressing his opinion on the man, he absolutely loathed the very ground Trump walked on, and not only because of his politically incorrect comments about immigrants and anyone who didn't conform to his biased, twisted White American utopia.

"And please don't expect me to say something inspirational like, I'm sure you'll find someone who will love you for who you are." Levi rolled his eyes.

Erwin laughed.

"Don't worry, I never expected you to say anything like that," he assured Levi. "I don't need romance, anyway. I'm dedicated to my job, and to improving this country. It takes up enough of my time as is."

"You're the real deal, right?" Levi said, staring at Erwin incredulously. "You really want to be in politics because you want to change things? That's like... where's the camera? You're having me on right now, Commander Handsome. There's no way you're just... what's wrong with you?"

"You really don't know a lot about my platform, do you?" Erwin asked, still chuckling. "You might want to read up on it. I think it would change your mind about some of your preconceptions of politicians."

He retreated into his office, the cup at his lips.

"I realize I should have done more research before coming here," Levi said as an afterthought as he watched Erwin's retreating back. He wondered just how long the man stayed at the office every evening. It was obvious Erwin wasn't sleeping very well. Even though he undoubtedly looked perfect in meetings and photos, there were dark circles under his eyes that could only come from one source: insomnia. Levi knew that for sure, given the fact that the sacks under his eyes could carry crops for the whole state of Indiana.

Levi finally finished up on his work around two in the morning. He glanced at the clock, cursing when he saw how late it was, and then stood, putting the folder away quickly. He glanced at Erwin's office door, the underside of which was still lit up. Hesitantly, he made his way over and knocked.

"Sir? I think... it's time for even the craziest of us to go home and sleep."

Erwin yawned and started shutting down his computer and gathering his things.

"You're right," he agreed. "Do you need a ride home? The metro and busses stopped a couple hours ago."

Levi knew that he shouldn't accept the offer. It was unprofessional to do so, but then again, he didn't fancy the idea of walking all the way home. He bit his lip and then finally managed to shake his head.

"No, it's all right. I don't live far from here." _Only a couple of miles away,_ he thought bitterly.

"Thank you for the opportunity to work here, Mr. Smith. Good night," he said quietly, turning on his heel.

"Okay," Erwin said, though if looked like he really didn't like the idea of Levi walking alone at this time of night. "Be safe. I'll see you tomorrow.”

Levi waved at Erwin half-heartedly and slung his messenger bag over his shoulder. He rode the elevator downstairs and then set off down the street towards his apartment block in the significantly less fortunate part of the city. Twice some drunkards tried to shoulder him roughly out of their way, but hunched his back and looked at his feet as he hurried along. He didn't want to get into a fight on his first day at work. Now and then, his thoughts strayed to the strange Erwin Smith, the politician with weird ideas about politics.


	2. The Accident

Levi's morning began with the sound of breaking glass. It was probably a storefront or something, judging by the magnitude. He sighed, rolling out of bed with his back aching from the absolutely unusable mattress he'd salvaged from being thrown away several weeks ago.

He trudged over to the kitchen to make use of the only luxury item he kept in his apartment – or so it was in his mind, anyway. While the tea was brewing, he sat down and pulled out his phone to check the news. Nothing particularly riveting: wars, scandals, more wars. He quickly had his tea, saving some for later tonight in the pot, and then dressed in the only relatively good suit he owned, the one whose cuffs were slightly less frayed, already running down the stairs to get to the underground.

He was right on time as he ran into the office, cursing the underground lines for having been cut due to some electric malfunction. Typical. He found himself staring at Petra who offered him a drink of water and a compassionate glance, before nodding toward Erwin's door.

"You need to go in there and tell him his agenda for the day. The man can't get any appointments straight by himself."

Levi grabbed Erwin's planner from his desk, which he'd conveniently placed there the night before, somehow knowing the man would be too flustered to get his own schedule down. He walked into the office, momentarily blown away by how perfect the man was able to look this early in the morning. All perfectly dressed and coiffed, although slightly disarrayed – in a dashing sort of way that would make any fangirl swoon. 

Then he righted himself and cleared his throat.

"Good morning, sir."

"Just the man I was looking for," Erwin told Levi as he looked up. "What does my schedule look like today?"

_Not even a good morning? Fuckwit._

"Like Bernie Sanders' chances at becoming President," Levi said grimly. "You have an appointment in half an hour with the Natural Resources representative, then some guy from Kraft will come to lobby with you regarding nutritional information policies, then a meeting with someone named Sandy Vega, who apparently is a former Playboy model and is now running your rival's electoral campaign. I wonder what she wants."

"I'm not sure I even want to find out," Erwin groaned. "Thank you, though. I know I have some phone meetings also, but that schedule I should have online. Just let me know when my in-person meetings get here so I can wrap everything else up before I let them in."

"All right. Do you want some more coffee? Although I don't think I am able to milk this many cows. Seriously, how can you drink this swill?" Levi asked, eyeing the milk-and-a-dash-of-coffee concoction on Erwin's desk.

"For someone who majored in office ethics, you sure have a way of talking back," Erwin commented with a laugh. "But yes, I could use another cup of coffee. I've only had three so far today. Normally I need at least four before being able to sit through any meetings. Congressmen and lobbyists are notorious for being either extraordinarily frustrating or extraordinarily boring."

"How about you take one shot of espresso and save yourself the lactose backlash?" Levi suggested.

"I like milk; the calcium is good for your bones," Erwin explained with a smile. Levi rolled his eyes, having been told that at the orphanage enough times when he had complained about being so short.

"Would you like me to take notes at the meetings or are those strictly confidential?"

"Yes, I'll need you to take notes for the meeting with the Natural Resources representative. You don't need to be here for the lobbyist, since they'll come with fact sheets and all that to give me anyway. The Playboy model... I don't know what she wants, but it might be best if you were here taking notes, anyway." That way if she tried anything inappropriate, the Senator had a witness. Of course.

Levi had to hand it to Erwin – it would have been too easy for the man to make a jab at Levi's height and claim it was his lack of milk intake that had been the reason. He also snorted at Erwin's bullshit excuse for the Playboy model.

"I suppose I can be your guard dog for that one. For someone as... aesthetically appealing and charismatic as yourself, you sure are uneasy around questionable persons."

Erwin raised an eyebrow at Levi calling him 'aesthetically pleasing.'

"I don't approve of any appropriateness in the workplace, especially coming from my opponent's campaign manager. If she were to try something, it would be with the worst intentions, and while there is a security camera in my office that would show the truth if she were to accuse me of anything, it's always best to have a witness, as well. Besides, I'm hoping just your presence will be enough to stop her from trying anything.”

"Am I that scary?" Levi asked, now feeling more at ease with the discussion. Erwin seemed like a very open man, and he didn't really know how he felt about that per se, but it did put his mind to rest just a little bit. At least he knew he wasn't the only one who was uncomfortable around unprofessional people.

"No, I'm simply hoping she'd be put off by the idea of a witness," Erwin explained. "Though I probably shouldn't be thinking the worst of her like this. It's just, knowing Nile Dok, he wouldn't exactly be opposed to dirty methods of winning."

"Nile Dok, huh? That's a name I've definitely heard before, considering he's on television all the time." Levi rolled his eyes. "I don't know your policy on verbally putting down your rivals around here but can I just say? Dok cannot win if this country knows what's good for it."

"I try to not resort to insulting my fellow candidates when I'm talking to the press," Erwin said. "But trust me, everyone in this office needs to get out their frustration somehow. I'm just glad no one's put up a picture of his face on a dartboard yet, though I think the only reason they haven't is because it wouldn't be appropriate when I have so many meetings and people coming and going who would be horrified at that."

"I suppose there's always a storage closet we can use for voodoo dolls of his ugly mug." Levi sighed, knowing that he was probably saying a bit too much. But Erwin laughed, so he continued. "The man's a swine. I can't believe his anti-LGBT thing passed the first draft. Unbelievable."

"Neither can I," the Senator groaned when Levi brought up the bill Nile had wrote saying that discriminating against people for their sexuality was a "religious freedom."

"Thank god it got shot down. Barely. But it got shot down. It was complete bullshit."

Levi's eyebrows shot up at Erwin's expletive. "Damn, Senator. Looks like Nile Dok is the only person capable of bringing out your humanity. You've got quite the potty mouth when you're not on YouTube."

"If you had to deal with politicians and lobbyists all day every day, you'd need to curse sometimes too," Erwin assured Levi.

"I do deal with politicians and lobbyists every day," Levi pointed out. "Well, now that you've given me a job, that is."

"Yes, but you won't be expected to talk with them and listen to them," Erwin said. "Though when you're taking notes at meetings... It's probably best if you tried keeping your reactions to yourself. Or embellish in the notes themselves. Just try not to react out loud."

"I will try to doodle as loudly as possible to block out the shit they'll be saying," Levi said with a smirk on his face. He picked up Erwin's mug and nodded at the man. "I'll be in the kitchen getting that swill of yours. Cheers."

Levi went to the kitchen only to find Erwin's chief of staff, Oluo, sitting on the countertop, stirring what looked like three cubes of sugar in a tiny cup of coffee. Everyone in this office was apparently crazy or lacked taste buds.

"Well hello there, newbie," Oluo said with a smirk on his face. "I wonder how long you will last."

Petra, who just came into the kitchen, slapped Oluo on the arm.

Levi said nothing as he started up the machine.

"Don't scare him," Petra chastised. "You make it sound like Erwin's some kind of scary, Devil-Wears-Prada boss."

"No," Oluo admitted. "But he does work all the time. Word of advice for you, kid-" He was talking to Levi again. "- Don't try to stay at work as late as he does. In college they tell you not to leave before your boss because it makes you look like a dedicated employee or whatever, but Erwin stays here till midnight sometimes."

Levi glanced at Oluo, unimpressed by the display of dominance.

"Been there, done that, old man. The Senator actually enjoys my company, and I don't mind putting in a few extra hours to make the boss like me. Unlike some, I actually care about scaling the career ladder. Cheers." With that, he was out of the kitchen.

"Hey!" Oluo called, biting his tongue in the process. "I'm the head of staff here, you know! You're just an assistant!"

Levi sighed as he brought in Erwin's coffee. He wasn't going to rat on Oluo, because he didn't need any additional problems besides being new here. "Here's your concoction. Enjoy."

Erwin smiled and took the mug from Levi and tasted the coffee.

"Got it right on the first try, very good," he complimented. "Now, I think my first meeting should be arriving any minute now."

Levi nodded and left the office to be there when the first appointment arrived. Fashionably late, of course, the man showed up with a grin on his face and an enormous briefcase to boot. He gave Levi a once-over, curled his lip at Levi's suit, and proceeded to walk into Erwin's office without so much as a greeting.

He was slightly strung already when Erwin peeked out from behind the door.

 "Levi? Could you come take notes for this meeting?"

"Of course, Senator," Levi said primly, picking up his notepad and walking into the office to sit in the corner.

The man from the NR Committee raised an eyebrow. "Pen and paper? How rustic of you, Senator. Methinks your employees should be entitled to personal electronics."

"I'm more of a pen and paper man myself," Erwin told the man, sitting back down at his desk. "If Levi felt more comfortable taking notes on the computer, he could use the laptop we issued him, but I'd print the notes out anyway. Besides, reading everything on a screen is bad for your eyes."

"Levi, huh?" The committee guy eyed the assistant for a moment before shrugging and turning his attention back towards Erwin. "Well, it's not my place to discuss the way you run your campaign. Besides the obvious, of course." He gestured to the heap of papers he'd brought with him.

"Right," Erwin said with a forced smile. "Well, why don't you tell me why you're here, then?"

"You know perfectly well why I am here, Senator," the man said darkly. "You've been running this campaign for several months now and not a mention of the deal you and I discussed last fall."

"Oh?" Erwin asked, eyebrow raised. "And what deal would that be?"

"We want the reusable energy cut from your agenda," NR guy said and Levi lifted his eyebrows. "I know it's all about that nowadays but our friends in BP really don't like where this is going."

"I seem to remember saying I'd take your platform into consideration," Erwin said. "But the numbers don't lie. The only people who are still pro-oil are the elderly, and they're not my target anyway. Cutting reusable energy from my agenda would just lose me voters, so why should I?"

"Because you used those 2,5 mil we lent you to launch this thing in the first place. Senator Zackley, for example, is very displeased that you did such a thing without his knowledge."

"That was a donation to a PAC that supports my campaign," Erwin said with a smile. "As I'm sure you're aware, I have no interaction with the goings-on of my PAC; it's against the law. I'm very grateful for the donation, though. Unfortunately, unless you've come up with a renewable form of clean-burning oil, I can't support your platform. Energy is an important topic, especially among voters in my key demographics. I can't just ignore the issue."

"You do realize that this decision is going to have consequences you cannot possibly predict," NR guy said and Levi found himself flustered at such audacity. Some measly clerk was trying to get Erwin to stand down on an issue of vital importance.

"I think you're underestimating my powers of prediction," Erwin told the man. "You're going to go give financial backing to Nile Dok, have him talk about how oil is cheap and it creates jobs or something like that and talk about solar and wind energy being expensive and how natural gas burns 'clean' and fracking has 'no harm on the environment' even though we've seen that it does. So I'll simply refute all your claims with actual facts and figures, point out that solar and wind power would create more jobs in America than oil and gas and that it could make the US completely energy independent and would be cheaper in the long run as well as better for the environment... you may have more money, but that doesn't change the fact that oil and gas is a dying industry."

"Oil and gas are still going strong and you are naïve to think otherwise," NR guy said, almost spitting in his vehemence. Levi lifted an eyebrow and put aside his outdated pen and paper, standing up. "With all due respect, sir, weren't you the one who commented on the Senator's lack of... update when you saw me writing using a simple gel pen? Soon, people will say the same of any candidate you endorse who give positive reviews to your agenda. Precisely because solar and wind energy are on the rise and BP's about to breathe its last shuddering breath."

"How dare you speak to me like that!" NR guy said, slamming shut his briefcase and standing up. "I didn't come here to be insulted like this!"

"No, you came here to try to bribe me into supporting your agenda," Erwin corrected. "And I'm afraid it's not going to work. Thank you for your contribution to the campaign, but like I said - there was never any obligation there."

Levi crossed his arms in front of his chest. "First of all, I am a potential voter, right here. Me. The new generation. Recently unemployed. I am one of the millions you are targeting and I am telling you it's not going to work."

The Natural Resources representative didn't even dignify Levi with an answer. Instead, he just huffed and stormed out of the office. Once the door was shut behind him, Erwin broke into laughter.

Levi looked at Erwin as if he'd grown three heads.

"Are you all right, sir?" He asked, already thinking about how he was going to explain to his friends that he'd gotten fired on his second day of work.

"I'm more than fine," Erwin assured Levi, wiping a tear from the corner of his eye. "I haven't had a meeting that enjoyable in a long time."

Levi looked up at the man.

"I'm not... fired? I thought I fucked everything up. And I just said fuck. I... uh, do you want more coffee?" He grabbed the mug without realizing that it was still half-full, making the liquid splash all over Erwin's thankfully bare conference table. "Fuck. Uh, damn it. I'll... I'll clean this up..."

"No, you're not fired," Erwin assured Levi, rifling through his drawers to find some napkins to help clean up the spilled coffee. "I mean, obviously you shouldn't do anything like that in other meetings, but there was no chance of that meeting ending well to begin with, so it's not a big deal."

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said anything," Levi said, grabbing the napkins desperately and soaking up the coffee residue. His hands were shaking and he realized that if he didn't clean this up now and get out of there as soon as possible, he was definitely going to get sacked for weirding out the boss.

"It's okay," Erwin assured Levi, tone changing to a more reassuring one as he noticed his assistant's hands shaking. "Levi, are you alright? I'm not going to fire you."

"I... I'm sorry, I..." Levi tried to take a breath, finding it increasingly difficult. He managed to take the soaked napkins and pull away from the table, looking down at his feet. "I'll go get a rag to do this properly, I... damn it, I c-can't..."

"It's okay," Erwin repeated. "I can have one of the interns do it. Why don't you take a couple minutes to calm down?"

"I... I have a p-problem with... with dirt," Levi managed to get out, grasping at the edge of the desk for support. "I'm sorry if I... fucking weirdo..."

"You're not a weirdo," Erwin assured Levi, hand hovering near the assistant's shoulder but unsure if he'd be okay with being touched. "Please, why don't you sit down so you can focus on breathing? I'll go get a rag to clean this up."

It seemed Erwin wasn't a stranger to panic attacks.

"I... no, it's... it's fine, I need to learn to... do my job without... freaking out like... this..." Levi exhaled, clutching onto Erwin's sleeve to stop him from leaving.

"Okay," Erwin said. "I don't want you to have to go out there looking like this, though. Would it be alright for me to get the rag, at least, and you could clean it up?"

"I... all right," Levi said, looking down at his knees as he propped himself against the table, his hands still shaking like mad. "I'm sorry."

"It's alright," Erwin promised. "If you want to wash you face or anything, feel free to use my bathroom right through that door there." One of the perks of being a senator was having a private bathroom just off his office. Erwin grabbed the spilled coffee cup and left the room, heading into the kitchen for a rag.

Levi sat on the edge of the desk, shaking and rocking back and forth. He hadn't had an attack this bad in a while, and it was just shit luck that he'd managed to get one on the second day of his employment with perfect, clean-cut Erwin fucking Smith who was so damn good and kind-hearted that he had actually gone to get that fucking rag himself. How the hell was he supposed to behave around the man now?

Erwin returned with a glass of water and a rug.

"I got you some water," he told Levi. "If you want it."

Levi muttered a thanks and took the glass with both hands to prevent the water from spilling too much as his fingers still shook. He sipped a little of the water and coughed when it went down the wrong way. "F-fucking... pathetic..." he stammered, looking up at Erwin with a sheepish little smile.

"Hey," Erwin said gently. "You're not pathetic. Panic attacks happen. It's not your fault that you get them, and you can't control when they'll happen, right?"

"You sound like... you know from... experience," Levi gasped out, finally feeling like he was regaining control of his faculties, step by torturous step.

Erwin shrugged.

 "We all have our demons," he commented elusively.

"Oh," Levi said quietly, looking down at his hands. Finally, they stopped shaking, and he got off the desk tentatively, looking at his employer.

"I apologize... again... for that," he said. "It won't happen again. I promise. I... was caught unawares."

"It's okay," Erwin repeated for the millionth time. "If it does happen again, take as much time as you need to recover, alright?"

"It's fine," Levi said, his voice more confident now. "I need to be able to do my job, Senator. Thank you for understanding but it won't be necessary anymore."

He reached for the rag and started mopping up the mess methodically.

"Alright," Erwin said, not wanting to push Levi any further. He grabbed his mug and went to sit down at his desk again to look at his schedule. "I have to get on a phone call here in a minute," he told Levi, picking up the phone and started dialing into his meeting.

Levi nodded absent-mindedly as he continued his work of cleaning up Erwin's desk. The intrusive compulsive thoughts were slowly receding and he found himself horrified by the show he'd made himself out to be. He finished up quickly and practically sprinted out of the office, too embarrassed to even apologize again. That afternoon, he answered the phone on autopilot, and when the time came to greet the former Playboy bunny, he felt like he was going to barf.


End file.
